I once heard Crystal Lewis sing about trading ashes for beauty and I think I’m ready to take her up on that deal. In the last two weeks, I have had close encounters with my share of ashes. Two family members have passed away, others are fighting Covid-19 and a few days ago my husband’s rural childhood home was burned to the ground, along with two of the family pets inside. Is it 2021, yet?
Don’t misunderstand me, I’m not looking for pity nor do I mean to minimize challenges others will face this holiday season. Loss, especially unexpected loss, cannot be conveyed, only experienced. Whether it is loss of life, relationships, dreams or things, it is still loss. So many people are taking December one day at a time, sifting through the ashes of 2020 while others are up to their necks in holiday cheer. I will not try to make sense of it; only acknowledge this holiday season is sadly different for more people than it is the same.
You know what I loved about the family members we lost? Each was unique and had their own sense of family. One held a small group very tightly while the other extended family to include many people. The latter will have a memorial service net summer when large gatherings are no longer a pandemic concern.
And what about the house? I watched fire consume a lifetime of irreplaceable keepsakes including more than 500 collectible chickens (spare me the smoked chicken jokes). My in-laws spent 50 years in that house raising kids, growing a garden and enjoying country life. Plans are being made to rebuild the home in the spring, and yet, we must first struggle with fewer stockings on the mantle this Christmas.
Maybe your loss is one of personal safety or self-respect. These are not tangible losses, but certainly worth grieving and working to re-obtain. Regardless of the loss you may have faced this year, you can take comfort in the Hope of the season. The sun will rise on January 1 and we aren’t meant to stay down, but to rise with it and to live life abundantly.
The rest of the song Ms. Lewis sang mentions replacing “strength for fear, gladness for mourning and peace for despair” that can only be granted by faith. Beauty and gladness will come later. For the next two weeks, I would settle for strength and peace. Wouldn’t we all?